Fashionable Flats vs. Sexy Heels (part 1)

Most women love shoes.  The right pair of shoes can help transform a woman’s walk, mood, posture, and perfect her outfit.

Traditionally, men are supposed to be bigger than women:  taller and with a bigger build.

Men definitely don’t like fat women, but guess what? They usually don’t like women who are much bigger than them either.  It’s not as simple as figuring out who is taller or heavier, but men like to feel like they are bigger than their girl.  They want to feel like they can protect a girl from bad guys and animals, and not the other way around!

Masculinity tends to be tied to height and build.  This is why guys spend so much time trying to bulk up and get big.  Or, if they are not tall, they love to work hard to become rich and throw their money and power in tall guys’ faces.

Many successful and/or otherwise attractive men tend to not be super tall.* (*There are many very tall successful men too.)

This can be a challenge for a girl who is fairly blessed with height, or who just happens to be with a guy who is her little “napoleon” conqueror.

Girls known for being tall and also super hot:

• Supermodels or high-end world class models
• International level beauty pageant contestants and winners (check out Miss Universe and Miss World contestants, especially the ones from Venezuela and Puerto Rico and even from India)
• Daughters of successful men* (there are studies where taller men tend to be better paid; the height just makes them look like leaders perhaps?)

The super hot tall girls all tend to have very small frames as well, which helps make them still look feminine rather than manly.

So what happens when tall beautiful girls and successful less-tall guys get together?

Carla Bruni is a former supermodel and now the wife of the Prime Minister of France, Nicolas Sarkozy.

Rather than taking the rockstar + model girlfriend route of not caring about the the height difference, Carla and Nicolas have tried to minimize it (“Why Carla Bruni is looking a bit down at heel“, “Nicolas Sarkozy and Carla Bruni: Why no heels?“)

What Carla seems to be doing:

• She wears flats or very low-heeled shoes, that are as fashionable and feminine as possible (if they can’t be sexy they can still be cute and femmy)
• She’s very slim (supermodel!), so she doesn’t need heels to skinny her up and elongate her
• She wears clothes that are very feminine and with a sexy cut, so that she still looks sensual and hot:

• She also makes sexy poses and expressions, perhaps a bit more so than normal.  Being sexy vs. slutty is all about balance
• She also tries to position herself so that she seems shorter at times, without looking slouchy or odd.  This includes putting herself on the bottom part of a sloping hill in relation to her man:

But Heels Are Just Plain Sexier!

So here is a dilemma: heels are just plain sexier.  The shoes are more stylish, more girly looking, and they do the following to a girl: push out her butt, elongate her legs, and force her to stick out her chest.

Even a frumpy boyfriend jacket outfit looks sexy with some heels (and make-up and hair)

Why oh why can’t these be 2 inch heels rather than 5 inch ones?

So what’s a girl to do?

I’m still figuring this out, but I’ll leave you with a few more ideas:

• If you already have a man:

Adjust your heel heights accordingly.  When going out during the day, rock the flats and low heels.

In the evenings, if you want to keep the shoes as low as possible you’ll need to do a lot of shopping beforehand to find something that will be appropriate.  Check out Zappos.com and Endless.com for a large selection of shoes (unfortunately the high-end shoes are even worse for finding sexy flats, although you can stalk Carla Bruni articles to find out what she gets).  I’ve found that the more formal evening shoes with low heels tend to be sandal slides.  I’m not crazy for slides, but that’s what tends to be available for some reason.

It’s not as obvious here that her heels made her taller, you can google for more pictures where she’s obviously taller or shorter

If you don’t mind being a little taller than him, it may work better to do that in the evenings or n formal occassions.  The main thing is that you must always look smaller and more girly than him, despite being taller.  I wouldn’t try to be more than an inch or so taller, in any case.  And when you are standing with him, practice ways to temporarily get shorter (sticking out your hip, slouching from the hips, etc.) while still looking elegant. In pictures definitely try to bend your knees slightly so you don’t look like the giant chick next to him.

• If you are trying to meet a man:

This is the risk zone.  Many guys who are not that tall are used to many women being taller than than them.  Some don’t mind a taller woman if she is really hot, but some do mind.

I would tend to wear as low of a heel as possible if you are a fairly tall girl.  This opens up so many more options in terms of guys.  It is tough to get hot and sexy shoes that are with heels less than 4 inches, but you need to do a lot of shopping and research.  And follow Carla Bruni’s example and sex it up in the other parts of your look (outfit, hair, expressions, etc.).

• If you are a short girl:

None of this post applies to you!  Get outta here, lucky girl! You can wear all the sexy heels with no issues. 🙂