So When Did You Guys…

A distant yet cherished friend of mine and I were catching up.  She knew I was recently engaged and it was a great time for us to reconnect.

She’s the sort of friend I don’t talk to or see a lot, but somehow we have this instantaneous soul connection and trust.  We end up talking about some pretty deep things without hesitation.

She begins probing how my fiance and I met, how our relationship progressed.  She hints around about when we slept together – our first date, second, third, etc.

You see, she is in her 30s and single.  Surprisingly single, and I don’t mean that in the way you usually think.  She’s glowingly beautiful with an inner peace and calm.  She’s stylish, she’s incredibly sweet, and a great cook and hostess.  She’s fun yet dignified.  She seems to be in reality about where men and women relatively rank.  She lives in NYC, however, although lots of girls get married in NYC despite the culture…

Well she was shocked to hear that I never slept with my fiance like that.  That I deflected his advances with cutesy little tricks and avoidances, and basically being a ditz.  Haha… and that I even insisted on separate hotel rooms when we went on a trip together.  Without caring how embarrassing that might be with his friends who were also on the trip.

She said she thought guys won’t wait around if you don’t let them have their way.  I told her it’s true – most guys won’t.  But if it matters to you, then you just have to keep on looking around until you find the ones who are willing to wait.  And who might even respect and cherish it.

The key is to make your non-sexual value so incredibly high, that it’s worth the tradeoff for him. And of course to choose wisely, by casting a pretty wide net and being more open.

No girl should ever feel like she can’t find a man without putting out.  No, no, no.  It may take time, but if you work on being your very best in every way – physically, mentally, spiritually… it will happen.  Or, you will have found inner peace in the process and be OK with however you end up.  (That last point seems lost on most people, but that’s OK.)

Most guys are up front, just listen to them… but don’t hate them for being honest either! Just have fun. 😉

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4 Responses to “So When Did You Guys…”

  1. Vincent Ignatius Says:

    I’d be willing to wait for a virgin, but I’d definitely be having sex with other women. Then again, I’d be doing that even if my girlfriend was putting out.

  2. Anon Says:

    So what else can you provide other than sex that a guy can’t already do?

  3. lovelysexybeauty Says:

    VI – Well guys like you don’t count then 😉 Too special

    Anon – My blog and GirlGame (http://girlgame.wordpress.com) talk about things exactly like that… keep on reading, it will be apparent! (Little hint: few men – or women – can make it through life’s ups and downs alone *happily*)

  4. Girl Tips from Boy Game: The Social Proposal « LovelySexyBeauty: adventures in love, enchantment, & beauty Says:

    […] am one of those extremely rare weirdo girls who is waiting for marriage. This doesn’t mean I primly sit with my hands folded in my lap, fully clothed neck to ankles, […]

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