Posts Tagged ‘engagement’

Effusive Congrats to the Bride… Why??

September 15, 2010

So one thing I don’t get is why people will go way out of their way to congratulate you at the mere mention of being engaged and/or planning a wedding.

A small congrats is nice, sure.  But when they absolutely gush at you like it’s the most amazing thing ever?  I don’t get it.

I was listening to Cosmo radio on Sirius (yeah yeah I know) earlier this summer.  Taylor the morning host was complaining about not being congratulated enough about her upcoming wedding by the coordinator of an exclusive Hamptons restaurant (who didn’t entertain her desire to lower the minimum price for her bridal shower).

What is this logic?  I don’t get it. Whenever I’ve met an upcoming bride, I’ve usually just smiled and asked if they are excited.

Am I rude to not gush?

Marriage is a beautiful thing but why fawn over the upcoming bride so much?  The feelings should be gushing forth from the couple’s love.

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On another note, one thing that gets some guys’ eyes sparkling is talking about your bachelorette party.  I’m certain is the prospect of many young (usually), nubile women out on the town looking for some good, possibly promiscuous fun.

The number times I’ve been asked particulars about where my bachelorette party is, where we are staying, where we are going, do we want to meet up with xyz…. ahaha.  A girl doesn’t need to look for trouble on her hen trip, trouble will find her with no problem. 😉

Girl Tips from Boy Game: The Social Proposal

May 19, 2010

A post over at Roissy’s (“Second Thoughts“) was about how a particular girl announced her recent proposal on Facebook.  The picture and her caption are particularly illustrating.

The commentary on the post ended up giving me an interesting comparison point – how did I “measure up” when I was proposed to?  Have I rid myself of most unfeminine tendencies or do some still linger?

Skimming the comments, I picked out a few that indicated what was “wrong” with what this girl did, and what would’ve been “right” (which I apparently did do :-)):

Mm….looks like I might’ve passed the test back when my proposal came (listing this out for the ladies who read to learn like me)

Omega Man
“The picture should be a cute shot of the two cuddling joyfully just after the proposal.”
Check…yay

Tarl
“I might be more worried if she said nothing about it. If she says nothing, is she not really committed to the idea?”
Check… cool. Thought I was being douchette… but I didn’t want to have to call 134,098 people to share the news when the interwebs can do that for me!

EastPole
“With her reaction being ‘FUN!’, as opposed to “I’m in love!”, or “I’m marrying the best guy ever!”
Check… for the latter type of phrase of course :-) (“Luckiest girl in the universe!!” etc.)

Yay. 🙂
***The way I put up information on my proposal (and love status in general) on social networks isn’t some sort of deliberate attempt at “GirlGame” by the way.***

I don’t try “seem like” a perfect paragon of female love, devotion and sensuality. I try to be a perfect paragon of female love, devotion and sensuality.

Because I’ve worked to balance my feminine instincts and all that is good about girlhood – and am maybe 75% or more good at being fully girly – my natural response seemed to be the “right” one.

Also, the Guy is a pretty good combo. of retired Alpha/character and LTR-minded Alpha/low Alpha/higher Beta/Beta with some Game/etc.

So my passion and feelings for him arise naturally. (In my life I have never had an easier time relating to someone… while never having a harder time controlling myself with someone too, ahahah.)

But… His Temporary Beta-ization  Immediately Post-Proposal
On Roissy’s post about advice to girls, I mentioned an interesting effect that happened post-proposal for me.  It was a surprising validation of what a lot of these Game guys talk about.

Right after the proposal, my hubby-to-be got kind of mushy and emotional talking about how he knew I was the one, he wants to spend his life with me, etc.
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Everyone Loves an Engaged Couple

March 2, 2010

It’s been interesting to see the reaction the past few months to the newfound status of my Guy and I.

Friends, family, colleagues, and random strangers seem instantly delighted when they hear anything related to our path to “making it official.”

People buy us champagne toasts
People gush at what a beautiful/handsome couple we are
People call us out at events with well-wishes
People give us all sorts of advice (especially older people 🙂 )
People share their proposal and wedding stories
People volunteer to help us out in this way or that
People let our small annoyances go (thank goodness for that lol)
People generally just beam at us with big smiles and dreamy eyes

With all of the work and stress involved in making things permanent… it’s nice to get the constant cheerleader support of others to remind one why it’s worth it.

….

So my Guy was actually discouraged from making things official by some of his anti-marriage friends (and jealous girls who stalk him, lol).  I find the experience he went through in the context of the MRM/MRA along with PUA crowd’s arguments against marriage today very interesting. Especially since he clearly has options – although he has shared why I was the One of course too. 🙂